The Bear and I went to get our passports renewed. His nametag said Bob. Bob was efficient, thorough and a mother fucking racist.
My Fucked-Up Tennis Team is now completely fucked-up in an entirely new way.
After 57 years of surviving on this planet, I just found out, I'm deformed.
I love dirty words. Nothing can convey raw emotion and add meaning like throwing a few fucks or shits into the conversation.
Let's make a list of shit that better happen or we go all Yellow Vests like the French.
It only took 6 years to beat the Nazis. The Odyessey was done in 10. Wimps. It took me 50 years to finally win "the grass wars."
Jesus was sitting with him at bar in the Third World Club when the first signs of a metaphorical exoskeleton started to cover the douchebag millennial's body.
I've been in "husband" boot camp for 32 years. There's no graduation in sight.
I finally freed myself of the wicked Wix and moved my bullshit to WordPress.
It was the one day of the year when the people of Tucson whispered "winter is coming" and dug in their closets to find their one dust-covered windbreaker.