Category: Bad Tech

Face it, no matter how great it can be, technology sucks.

Resurrection of the Roomba

By Kieran on December 28, 2021 • ( 5 Comments )

For nearly two decades, I grieved the loss of my original Roomba. The little robot vacuum that couldn’t.

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Suborbital subsidies

By Kieran on July 25, 2021 • ( 4 Comments )

Richard Branson couldn’t stop smiling and praising himself for “blasting off” as high as the Soviet Union sent a dog in the 1950’s. Jeff Bezos followed it up by tying the records set by “Ham” the chimp the US sent up in 1961.

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What the heat

By Kieran on July 6, 2021 • ( 2 Comments )

It’s fucking hot. 108 in Portland, 115 in Medford, Oregon. Those are typical for us here, where central air meets central Arizona. But now you can’t escape the heat even if you fly 1000-miles north.

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Shit Doctors Say

By Kieran on May 4, 2021 • ( 6 Comments )

As a patient, I’ve never got to spend more than about 5 minutes straight with a doctor. Unless I was unconscious and he was cutting something out of my body like my appendix or the soft disc in my lumbar spine. Then maybe I can afford the full hour.

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Shit online teachers say

By Kieran on March 16, 2021 • ( 3 Comments )

The echos of 7th grade math have been reverberating through my house for the past 2 months.

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Useless readers

By Kieran on March 11, 2021 • ( 4 Comments )

“Ohh Jesus, I can’t see it. Can you?” Sugar Mama asked as she held her phone as far away from her scrunched up face as possible.

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Facebook Bullshit

By Kieran on March 4, 2021 • ( 8 Comments )

For the four people who found this blog through Facebook, you may have noticed a change. No longer is my Facebook page called Kieran’s Bullshit.

Facebook called bullshit on Kieran’s Bullshit.

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WordPress – cheese movers

By Kieran on November 24, 2020 • ( 8 Comments )

Just when I was getting used to the new shittyness of the WordPress block editor – they fucked up the scheduler.

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Feeding my face

By Kieran on August 18, 2020 • ( 3 Comments )

I got a new iPhone with face recognition. Now my Twitter feed is fucking with me.

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My own hero

By Kieran on July 30, 2020 • ( 5 Comments )

I’ll bet you didn’t know, but I’m a fucking hero. I’m saving the ocean with every stupid search on the Google I make.

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Crushing PayPal

By Kieran on June 4, 2020 • ( 3 Comments )

PayPal is no friend of mine. I’ve been banned. I “knew too much.”

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Saving the Salton Sea

By Kieran on May 19, 2020 • ( 6 Comments )

I sometimes worry about my mental health. I’m lying in bed and I get these manic ideas of social research about spatial awareness or even how to save the world. You know bullshit theories.

This is a good one.

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X-Games — X is for extortion

By Kieran on May 5, 2020 • ( 8 Comments )

Email: Subject Line: [My favorite password]

Holy fucking shit, I’ve been hacked.

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Sailing

By Kieran on January 14, 2020 • ( 11 Comments )

I always wanted to be a sailor — owning my own little boat.
The Bear would never let me.

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Recycling is Bullshit

By Kieran on December 5, 2019 • ( 4 Comments )

The Bear was so fucking proud of the “campaign” she created for her 6th grade class using “Recycle Michael,” a tin-man like character made from “recyclables.”

…I don’t have the heart to tell her that recycling is bullshit.