Richard Branson couldn’t stop smiling and praising himself for “blasting off” as high as the Soviet Union sent a dog in the 1950’s. Jeff Bezos followed it up by tying the records set by “Ham” the chimp the US sent up in 1961.
It’s fucking hot. 108 in Portland, 115 in Medford, Oregon. Those are typical for us here, where central air meets central Arizona. But now you can’t escape the heat even if you fly 1000-miles north.
As a patient, I’ve never got to spend more than about 5 minutes straight with a doctor. Unless I was unconscious and he was cutting something out of my body like my appendix or the soft disc in my lumbar spine. Then maybe I can afford the full hour.
The echos of 7th grade math have been reverberating through my house for the past 2 months.
“Ohh Jesus, I can’t see it. Can you?” Sugar Mama asked as she held her phone as far away from her scrunched up face as possible.
For the four people who found this blog through Facebook, you may have noticed a change. No longer is my Facebook page called Kieran’s Bullshit.
Facebook called bullshit on Kieran’s Bullshit.
Just when I was getting used to the new shittyness of the WordPress block editor – they fucked up the scheduler.
I got a new iPhone with face recognition. Now my Twitter feed is fucking with me.
I’ll bet you didn’t know, but I’m a fucking hero. I’m saving the ocean with every stupid search on the Google I make.
PayPal is no friend of mine. I’ve been banned. I “knew too much.”
I sometimes worry about my mental health. I’m lying in bed and I get these manic ideas of social research about spatial awareness or even how to save the world. You know bullshit theories.
This is a good one.
Email: Subject Line: [My favorite password]
Holy fucking shit, I’ve been hacked.
I always wanted to be a sailor — owning my own little boat.
The Bear would never let me.
The Bear was so fucking proud of the “campaign” she created for her 6th grade class using “Recycle Michael,” a tin-man like character made from “recyclables.”
…I don’t have the heart to tell her that recycling is bullshit.
No means no goddamnit. But not at Apple.