Valentine’s Day has always sucked. Every girl in kindergarten didn’t want to be my Valentine, and 50 years later it hasn’t gotten any better.
This is a good time to remember the “Founders.” But if one more wanna be GOP “thinker” tells me he “believes in” the Constitution, I’m just going to take a shit on his shoe.
Twenty years ago, Prince made hits and people partied their way into the 21st Century. At midnight tonight, we are going to a new decade, but there are no songs, no anthems to celebrate the number.
If you make way more money than me, we can’t be friends.
I bumped into the shaming couple in the third world club the other night. They asked one simple question. They didn’t like my answer.
People produce plenty of food to feed everyone in the world. But don’t try to tell a vegan that.
As a semi-embarrassed member of the Baby Boom, I have to say I really like the expression “OK boomer.”
Hey happy day, I made the “special donor” list for the MAGA campaign.
Of course I did. I’m a white, baby boomer, male living in the reddest republican district in the reddish-purple state of Arizona.
Believe it or not, I’ve had some friends who are Libertarians.
Yeah I know — hard to believe I had friends and harder to believe they would be right-wing nut jobs.
Some old white guys hate taxes and never want to fund government research. Some old white guys are fucking idiots.
These goddamn pendejos from Tucson have taken body shaming to a whole fucking new level.
This time we were renting a few days with the 1% in the LJBTC community. Fuck Disneyland, the LJBTC is the happiest place on earth.
It fucking snowed in Denver in September this year. I don’t live in the mountains, but I know what that’s like.
About 20 years ago, I heard red wine is good for you. Probably bullshit, but that doesn’t keep me from drinking 2-3 bottles a month.
And not that good red wine either. I drink the cheap shit — straight from Trader Joes. Get ready to bend down low, because my bottles are on the bottom shelf.
I used to think I would never understand Evangelicals for Trump. What the fuck is wrong with these people? Can’t they read their own book?
When I first saw it, I was offended like an 18-year-old woman being called a “freshman” at an Ivy League School.