Porn in their pockets
Old people often look back on their youth as a simpler time. That’s bullshit. Life was complicated as soon as we dropped out of the trees and walked across the savannah on our hind legs.
Civilized Men
Civilization is created by women. Without them, it’s Lord of the Flies with more testosterone and back hair.
Lewis Black Harassment
Lewis Black hates tennis. But he closed his show in Austin, Texas on Friday, Nov. 22 with a little tale about the John Newcombe Tennis Ranch. (video)
Your little…
Recently I noticed a small thing about the Bear that has been driving me a bit crazy.
Whenever she refers to any thing about me or the things I like, she always adds this one adjective.
Drop that Swiffer
Some old white guys hate taxes and never want to fund government research. Some old white guys are fucking idiots.
My Love is Bigger than a Subaru
There’s a list of advantages to only spending weekends with the spouse. Surprise visits is not one of them.
My Dad’s Girlfriend(s)
My father is 88 years old. His biggest problem in the world is keeping his hometown girlfriend from meeting his traveling girlfriend.
I Can Finally Tell My Truth
It’s taken me months to fully admit it… But I can now say I was sexually harassed on a boat in Alaska.
Fucking Parking Lot
I was just two windows away from my second possible menage-a-trois, and I’m so old, I didn’t even turn around to look.
The Patriarchy Made Me Crush a Woman
I’ve got no evidence to prove it, but I’m convinced I almost crushed a woman just to support the patriarchy.
Hooray for Hooters
It had been a long day and a half in a crowded room listening to stories about work while not getting any work done. I couldn’t wait to head over to Hooters.
It had been built in our imaginations like a combination of Camelot and Plato’s Retreat. It was the first Hooters in the state — newly opened in downtown Phoenix.
Weirdest 3-way Ever
We were at the Bear’s second cousin’s wedding in New Mexico when it happened. I drank too much, and said something I thought was funny…
Menage a What The Fuck?
I only have one “sex” story that I used to share in public.
I was 16 years old and working at the ghetto grocery store that was a few blocks from my parents’ house. One winter night around 9 p.m. I was rounding up the last of the shopping carts in the parking lot.
This tiny little rusted out piece-of-shit sedan was a rockin’.
Free the Nipple — Updated
I have a lot of political opinions, but I don’t do much about them. I vote. But I don’t protest, I don’t donate to political causes very often, I don’t volunteer.
I’m suspicious of all groups. I’m not “a joiner”, and I really kinda hate people. But I finally found a political movement I can get behind: Free the Nipple.
Diphthong Denea
One of the fucked-up things about playing recreational tennis is away matches.
You have to drive to some other part of town and play on strange courts. And worse, we can’t just walk to the Third World bar to enjoy some popcorn and beer with the resident mice — we are forced to pick a different bar.
