It is not quite “The Boy Named Sue,” but Kieran is fucking close enough.
Let me tell you what will scare the fuck out of anyone with a brain and a sense of history — a little teeny, tiny book my father gave all his children when Trump was elected.
There are hours (never full days) when I miss being a teacher. Then the Bear tells me “how her day went” and I remember: ohh that shit sucks.
I’m hoping roosters taste exactly like chicken, because my other neighbor just got a Mother Fucking Rooster.
I learned recently that several fathers have let their children read this Bullshit. I’m seriously thinking about calling Child Protective Services.
I must confess and probably apologize… I’m a body-size bigot.
Valentine’s Day has always sucked. Every girl in kindergarten didn’t want to be my Valentine, and 50 years later it hasn’t gotten any better.
I just recently found out that in 1987 I made the biggest mistake of my life. I got married.
Fat Bikers are hell on wheels.
We all think Freud was a fool for “penis envy”. Well, I’ve got a similar theory about the other side of the taint.
This is a good time to remember the “Founders.” But if one more wanna be GOP “thinker” tells me he “believes in” the Constitution, I’m just going to take a shit on his shoe.
Did I tell you the Bear had a stroke?
Don’t worry it was long ago, and there are no obvious lasting effects other than (once in a while) she won’t shut up about it.
It’s January 18. The sun is shinning, but the air is cool…
Time for fucking fall in Gilbert, Arizona.
I always wanted to be a sailor — owning my own little boat.
The Bear would never let me.
Every fiber of my non-existent soul didn’t want to tell this story. It’s wrong on so many levels. Stop here if ye be afraid.