Fat Biker: Horse’s Ass
Put tires on my road bike that are 3 millimeters wider (25 to 28 mm), so I could ride on a little dirt. What did I get? A berating from two “expert” trail users.
Saving the Salton Sea
I sometimes worry about my mental health. I’m lying in bed and I get these manic ideas of social research about spatial awareness or even how to save the world. You know bullshit theories.
This is a good one.
Spanish Flu Redo
This “re-opening” shit is giving me Deja-Vu.
It’s either a glitch in the Matrix, or I’ve been watching too many fucking documentaries, and I spent too much time with my grandfather.
Booze and Broads and Bad Ideas
Other kids wanted to grow up to be astronauts, firefighters or doctors. I dreamed I was born the second son of a Landed Lord or a Robber Baron and blew the family fortune on booze and broads and bad ideas…
Who do you think you are f•%king foolin’
It took me 10 minutes to decide the •% symbols were the best to replace “uc” in fucking.
I had never used symbols to cover up letters in a dirty word before. If I’m going to use a dirty word, I want the full effect.
X-Games — X is for extortion
Email: Subject Line: [My favorite password]
Holy fucking shit, I’ve been hacked.
Chiweenie
Ignorance can be bliss.
I wish I had never learned the “breed” name for my little pandemic puppy.
Sealed Up Tight
My father’s Senior Living Community in Arizona is sealed like a zip-lock doggie bag.
No family in or out. The “inmates” can walk the courtyard but not outside the building.
Fat Biker: Passing M&M’s
I don’t want to admit how many tens-of-thousands of dollars I have spent on road bikes in the past decade. But in this pandemic, worth every fucking penny.
Killer Carol — Updated with Pics
I’ve had dogs that liked me, but they always “loved” other people. This past few weeks I found a dog that actually loves me. If I’m lucky, for the next 15 years, I won’t be able to take a shit by myself.
My new favorite joke
It took almost 20 years, but I have a new favorite joke.
My old favorite still makes me laugh, but not nearly as hard as it used to (be — a common condition at my age).
Fake ID for TP
For the first time in 35 years together, the Bear and I are doing a little bit of hoarding.
I know what you are thinking, and fuck you. It’s just a little bit of hoarding, and it’s not for us.
A Fifth of Hope
Just when I think Americans and their leaders are so fucked-up, the country hardly deserves to survive, we do something as a group I can finally salute.
Spousal Distancing
For not the first time in a decade, the man cave has come in handy.
REFUGE
Originally posted on stephen metcalfe:
? In my house, my place of escape, refuge, privacy, contemplation and uninterrupted reading is on the toilet. When the going gets tough, the tough get going and I go to the bathroom. Excuse me, I’ll say! I have to go sit for…
