I was struggling to get up Las Sendas when these four 70-something, fat ass, snowbirds from Michigan floated past me like they were riding on a cloud.
I don’t need no IQ test to tell how stupid people think I am. I just need the Bear to leave for a few days.
Talking shit about your "friends" on the internet should be endorsed by the American Psychological Association -- it's a great sanity check.
There are hours (never full days) when I miss being a teacher. Then the Bear tells me "how her day went" and I remember: ohh that shit sucks.
I'm hoping roosters taste exactly like chicken, because my other neighbor just got a Mother Fucking Rooster.
I must confess and probably apologize... I'm a body-size bigot.
Valentine's Day has always sucked. Every girl in kindergarten didn't want to be my Valentine, and 50 years later it hasn't gotten any better.
I just recently found out that in 1987 I made the biggest mistake of my life. I got married.
Fat Bikers are hell on wheels.
We all think Freud was a fool for "penis envy". Well, I've got a similar theory about the other side of the taint.