Tennis or Pickleball – you decide
“You know for someone who moves like you, pickleball is a good option,” they say. Fuck them.
Top 5 sports we should ban from Olympics
I’ve spent way too much time on the Olympic mix channel trying to pick one of the five NBC screens to watch — only to wonder “what the fuck is this doing in the Olympics” and turn the whole damn thing off.
In a Pickle(ball)
Remember when I said I would walk on a pickleball court when I was in hospice? Well, apparently I’m dying.
Dick Move or Nah?
Among the Pendejos we have a split decision on whether Shad should be nominated for a bronze medal in Dick Move of the Year 2021.
Abandon the Third-World Racquet Club — Updated
After a dozen years of living part time in the Dirty T, right around Christmas, I quit my job — so I’m selling my condo and abandoning the third-world racquet club.
A little bit of Akron in La Jolla
The LJBTC community was infested by two things from Akron, Ohio at the same time. The LJBTC will never be the same.
LJBTC doesn’t welcome me
Sometimes the universe hates my plans.
Lewis Black Harassment
Lewis Black hates tennis. But he closed his show in Austin, Texas on Friday, Nov. 22 with a little tale about the John Newcombe Tennis Ranch. (video)
Rain Pussies
It hadn’t rained in Tucson for 50 days and 50 nights. The first time it did, my fucked up tennis friends “ran away” like they were being chased by a killer rabbit.
The Biggest Bullshit Awards
I’ve been writing this bullshit for two-and-a-half-years. Jesus, I could have had a master’s degree by now. In those 30 months, I’ve gone from 5 to about 8 readers. Following how my god damn generation raised all these douchebags, when you hit 8 participants, it’s time to present the participation trophies.
Comedy Collection
I might have to break a couple of semi-famous thumbs.
Forgotten Dad Lessons
We often forget the impact we have on others. Here’s a little reminder that came from The Boy (now age 29) through Facebook Messenger of what a shitty dad I am.
I May Have Assaulted a Douchebag Millennial — Allegedly
If you see me being led away in handcuffs anytime soon, it was just life teaching me another little lesson about me. Here’s my side of the story.
Back in the US, Back in the US, Back in the USTA
I’ve ranted, raved and complained like a 2-year-old with no cookie about the United States Tennis Association. And just when I thought I was out for good, they pulled me back in.
Diphthong Denea
One of the fucked-up things about playing recreational tennis is away matches.
You have to drive to some other part of town and play on strange courts. And worse, we can’t just walk to the Third World bar to enjoy some popcorn and beer with the resident mice — we are forced to pick a different bar.
