Smart-Ass Car
I traded in a liar and got a smart ass.
I am happier now — the Lying Nazi Bullshit Diesel is dead. My new Honda Civic is “nice,” but these god damn “smart car” features make me want to strip to my bathrobe and scream “get off my lawn”.
No Towels for You – and Other Tales of the Third World
For most places, the holidays are time to reflect and improve. Not at the Third-World Racquet Club — these are the times when everything goes straight to the shitter.
The Lying Nazi is No More
The Lying Nazi Bullshit Diesel was an unstoppable zombie, but I finally knocked off it’s head with one dirty swing. I dropped it off at the VW dealer on Oct. 26. It was not a tearful goodbye. VW has it all on video tape. Turning in the car […]
My Lying Nazi Just Won't Die
My Lying Nazi Bullshit Diesel’s trip to hell has been delayed — again. I had the appointment to turn in the fucking thing over Labor Day.
I'm in Hot Water — Finally
Every time I try to do something good for the planet, I get screwed.
One Nazi Wiper
My Lying Nazi Bullshit Diesel is going to Volkswagen hell, one part at a time. The latest part to do the dance of the damned was the front wiper
My Lying Nazi VW has more Friends than I Do
Turns out my lying nazi bullshit diesel is not the only fucking bullshit diesel. They all are. Just in different ways
Pedestrians in parking lots
Who turns on the stupid switch when people are walking through parking lots? They fucking wander like lemmings across the lane where the goddamn cars go.
The State Says I Stink
The Bear has always hated my Lying Nazi Bullshit Diesel. Not because it’s a liar. Not because it’s killing the planet
Gas Station TV — Updated
The Lying Nazi Bullshit Diesel was really fucking picky about which diesel you put in it. I once stopped at a corner station in Tucson and 3 hours later the Lying Nazi came to a coughing halt.
The dealer said it had “dirty diesel” — like it’s fucking AC/DC (dirty diesel done dirt cheap).
Lewis Black reads the Miata Rant
On Saturday night, Lewis Black read the VW rant. On Sunday he followed up with this…
Lewis Black reads the VW rant
Lewis Black ended his rant show on Saturday night with my first VW rant. Enjoy.
VW screws me again
If you get the chance, give one of the fine “folk” at Volkswagen a poke in the eye for me —
Flying shoes
Lost: 1 purple sneaker somewhere on I-10 freeway
Found: 1 purple sneaker as it hit the windshield of my lying nazi bullshit diesel.
Reward: Yeah, here’s the reward for the dipshit douchebag millennial; you get to live without being named and shamed only because I don’t know who you are…
Mid-life car/crisis
I had to replace the lying nazi bullshit diesel, and for the first time in my life, I was acting like one of those asshole “undecided voters.”
